We gratefully acknowledge the original 'Disapproving Rabbits' website, that inspired this site, and its creators, Sharon, Bill, Cinnamon, and Dougal. Without you, we would not be here. We Approve Of You!

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Saturday, April 2, 2016

The Disapprovers - Catnip Stogie

Last Week on the Disapprovers: Molly tels everybun about the place she visited while in Singularia with Zeus and Mr. Toes. Mr. Toes has a strong reaction to her story and gets Abby to help him clean out the pot belly stove in the basement. They discuss the adventrue Mr. Toes would like to experience with the help of Singularia.
We finished the stove cleanup in the basement and hopped back to the top to rejoin the crew. Abby and I continued our discussion about the merits of fun. She had a good point about fun being useful and necessary if you don't want to go completely bonkers. It just never occurred to me to think of fun as "useful". A set of wrenches or a proper, orthopedic pad is useful. Math is useful, but fun? I don't think so. But to amuse Abby, I am willing to accept my fantasy adventure as a great way to get some R and R. I can work with that.
Abby Mila
By the time we finally got back to everybun, I was dead tired. All I wanted to do was to crawl under my pad and stay there for a couple of days. Maybe I could do that "flop of death" hoomins "love" so much? Our hoomin would pick me up and cuddle me. I could just nap and grit my teeth, have a snack, nap some more and forget all about Singularia and the laboratories, and the mean hoomins. Hm, then I realized, that that sounds like a lot of fun! Sigh...
When we got the chance to conspire again, we started putting together a timeline for how the bust had to proceed. We had to start with intelligence gathering. That meant layout of the place, habits of the staff and their movement patterns throughout the day and night. Luckily for us, the weather went south, literally south. Severe frontal passages, moving from the north-west to the south-east grounded Zeus and Mila. So we spent a lot of time brainstorming and doing all sorts of tabletop simulations trying to figure out how to get every critter out of the lab.
Then, one night, Zeus and Suzy put a huge damper on the whole idea. They wanted to address a bigger issue. "Can we do better than busting every bunny out of that lab?", asked Suzy. "If we cannot, we'll never get ahead of this problem. Don't get me wrong; we'll change the world of every critter we help, but that will do nothing to eliminate the of the root of the problem. We really need to do a root canal on it!" Then Zeus spoke up, "Let's see what we can dig up on the 'doctor,' his boss, the company, its parent company - if there is one - and up the chain of misery, one link at a time. Let's see where the money leads. When we find a good lead, we'll make them bleed!"
Well, I was ready to stand up and applaud, but I felt stunned. I wanted to call him "Commandante Zeus," too. Somebunny roll him a catnip stogie!
"What Che talking about?!?" asked Molly and we broke out laughing. Zeus grinned and slowly shook his head side to side and looked really proud of himself.
Suzy Frankie
Abby wanted to say something, but first, she sat up on her rear paws and grabbed her midriff and pretended to pull up a pair of pants,
"... look at this. Our britches aren't that big. And yours, Zeus, are even smaller. Are you getting my mid-drift?", and she winked.
"True, Abby, very true.", agreed Zeus. "I knew you'd come up with something like that. That's why I took the liberty to order every bunny a pair spandex britches. They'll stretch to whatever size we need them to be. As for myself, I'll carry out the mission just the way mother nature made me. No britches, no reservations, no regrets. Fear will be duly noted, appreciated, and then promptly whizzed on. How's that for a drift?"
Molly & Suzy Frankie & Freddie
We loved their performance, especially Frankie. He couldn't decide whether to laugh or cry, so he gave Zeus a huge, ratty bear hug.
Frankie continued, "If you're all done with your improv, let's go back to planning. Molly, how many beasties do you estimate we'll have to evacuate?"
"About 30 to 60.", replied Molly.
"That's some spread!", interjected Suzy.
"Yes, it is. We also figure we need 90 to 180 shelters, foster places or rescues. We can drop off up to 3 animals at each location and make it manageable for them, considering the extra resources they'll need to care for them."
"Do you have a list of them yet?", asked Abby.
"We have a partial; we're still working on it.", said Molly.
"Are you planning to use Singularia to transport them?", I asked.
"Indeed, if that's doable, of course. If Zeus and Mila can work that out. We could set up a triage next to Singularia, get the animals patched up and then get them to their destinations. Singularia would make things a lot easier."
"... and if we can't use Singularia?", I groaned.
"We'll come up with plan B.", declared Suzy, matter-of-factly.
Mr. Toes
"Why don't we just find us an exoplanet and drop off everybunny there...", I muttered under my nose, hoping no bun heard me. Right then Frankie looked at me, then at Freddie, then they both stared at me. I couldn't tell if I gave them an idea or stumbled upon one of theirs?

1 comment:

RG said...

This gambit gets more and more intriguing and complex. I thought bunnies just frowned and ate carrots.